Tag Archives: vancouver washington

“IT’S NOT A TUMOR!” ~ Det. John Kimble

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“IT’S NOT A TUMOR!” ~ Det. John Kimble

This morning I had to take the boy and girl child to apply to get their passports. According to the website for the post office, they do passport applications from 8 am to 2pm Monday through Friday.

Au Contraire, mes ami.

Apparently because of cutbacks, they have reduced the hours so we had to leave and comeback, ergo the kiddos missed even more school than I intended. WTF ever.

I digress.

The actual point of this post is that when I got out of the car at the post office the first time, the sun actually peeked out from a cloud and forced me to put my sunglasses to work as a sunglasses, rather than as a hair control tool.  Suddenly, from nowhere I smelled nag champa. LIKE BAM. The kids said “No, I don’t smell anything.” So I am smelling my clothes, the car, the air, whatever, like a crazy person while my children are laughing at me. I can’t find the source of this scent that is bordering on causing a headache. We go in the post office and it magically dissipates.

We come out a few minutes later, disgruntled at their ineptitude for changing websites (totally their fault I am sure) and I smell it again! The kids, nothing. My son offers that we are in the “hipster neighborhood” maybe there is just someone burning nag champa and only my well honed nose can smell it. Possible. So we go get the kid some crepes, while we wait.

An HOUR passes and we go back to the post office. Do what we need to do. Come out, and I smell it again. The kids laugh and at this point I am starting to believe it has something to do with the post office or phantom smells or paranormal hippie ghosts, perhaps I have had a stroke or I have a brain tumor, cause this is giving me a headache.

I turn down Washington, away from the sun and take my sunglasses off. Miraculously, the smell is gone. A light bulb went on. I put the sunglasses on, the smell is there. It was my sunglasses! I had them in the bathroom basket with my soaps overnight. They now STINK of nag champa.

HAHAHHAHAH. Well played, goat milk soap. Well played.

BUT HEY! All this means is the sun is shining! WEIRD!

I’ll take a nag champa induced headache over clouds any day.

Cheers!

xoxo

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The state of the world as I know it and random thoughts by Jani Handey

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The state of the world as I know it and random thoughts by Jani Handey
  1. Cartier makes beautiful commercials.
  2. Political issues worldwide and in Syria are going to make me unable to afford gas. I should fill up today.
  3. I am taking a waiver exam and hope it makes it so I don’t have to take stats again.
  4. I am applying for a magical internship and want it soooo bad.
  5. My arm is molting and I like it.
  6. I have an insatiable desire to shout “Ca-Cao” the next time I engage in coitus.
  7. I heart the big bang theory.
  8. My car is making an interesting noise in the front end driver’s side. I believe it may be a brake pad, but my super fab kids have suggested: rock in the caliper, hubcap rub, u-joint and bad brakes. They rock.
  9. Dru from Buffy the Vampire Slayer is not nearly as beautiful as I remember, but Spike is. Also, I still get pumped every time I hear the theme song. 
  10. I bought a baby gate to keep my attachment disordered dog away from the door when we are trying to sleep and he learned how to jump over it. Bastard.
  11. I want my back to look like Christina Aquilera’s in “Burlesque.”
  12. I have my whole first routine figured out for when I am a Burlesque dancer, now I just need to get to a point I am comfortable doing it in front of people.
  13. I went to Lacey, Washington yesterday and I believe that I would like it there or Olympia better. Just saying.
  14. I am about to take finals for my first term at this new school and I feel good about it.
  15. I think that Jack White, Johnny Depp and I could have made sweet music and babies together.
  16. There are 3 places open on my culdesac and only one set of less than lovely neighbors. I hope we get 3 good households, not more partiers. Especially since one of them will be right next to moi.
  17. Working out with Tracy Anderson videos makes me feel like a seizing hippo ballerina.
  18. Earthquake in San Fran area…precursor?

I guess that’s all. Carry on. Wish me luck. Happy thoughts!