Iahku

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Introvert unicorn

All I want for Christmas is…….

You to buy me the following things:

……….

That’s how my blog for this day had been planned to start off this morning.

While I showered this morning I was trying to come up with something either clever or poignant to blog about. I came up with something totally cute, witty and materialistic.

Then I got out of the shower to news of another mass shooting. I have no real words. I could go on about gun control or gender roles or mental health safety net deficiencies or developmental stages and testosterone and all sorts of things. But really, none of that matters.

I feel sadness for all the families involved in all the tragedies the last few months.

From Aurora to Clackamas to Newtown to China to the Gaza strip to Afghanistan and people killed by our drones and all our soldiers and everything else.

But I cannot dwell on it.

I cannot dwell on the personal issues I am facing.

I must take joy in things like getting a coveted spot at a nonprofit that I care about.

Like the delicious kisses from a little puppy.

Like the sheer brilliance in my daughter’s smile when she gets a new haircut.

Like the intense flashes of passion my son shows when describing something he cares about.

Like being able to write these things on my computer.

So maybe I will dream a bit and share my silly list.

It is tradition, after all.

Jani’s List for Santa:

1. A box of blue non-latex gloves, medium. I dye a lot of hair and my box is almost gone. One of those silly things I cannot rationalize buying…
2. This Nora Roberts book: The Perfect Hope (don’t judge me! Its the final book in a trilogy!)
3. The book my future first ex-wife wrote: Oh Nadia….
4. This album….It is seriously the only one by her I have ever wanted…I don’t know why I need it…there are a few songs that just well…Don’t judge me. I am already judging me.
5. These fabulous shoes: Not that I have anywhere to wear them.
6. ANYTHING unicorn. I have decided to restart my collection…You could start with this calendar.
7. This amazing pan! I am a mad cook and I need a nice pan!
8. I would also like to replenish my stock in this lovely oil.
9. This delicious dress, size 14 please.
10. Anything from this line, but I am almost out of this…my unicorn placenta cream….
11. Delicious stinkpretty juice.
12. This pattern and this fabric! (hahaha got two out of number twelve!)
13. A new blender for margaritas, er healthy smoothies.
14. LOTS of bottles of this wine. I prefer red usually but white is nice too.
15. An address book. Any address book. Mine is 17 years old and has names I want to forget and no room for new addresses! My BFF Lisa has 13 addresses in it! Are you kidding? I have white out on white out on different colored markers!

So yes. Come on fans! Get me presents! I’ll give you a PO Box if you want to send them 😉

Merry ChriskwanzahanaksolsticeFESTIVUS!

Remember the words of Anne Frank….

“It’s really a wonder that I haven’t dropped all my ideals, because they seem so absurd and impossible to carry out. Yet I keep them, because in spite of everything, I still believe that people are really good at heart.”

Things I wish were real:

There are so many things that I wish were real and practical in this world. Here is a short list of things I wish were real and things that I (contrary to popular belief actually BELIEVE are real…)

1. Unicorns. I grew up surrounded by them, Shel Silverstein songs about them and collecting my little ponies. (STFU) I suggest everyone carry this with them until they find one: Magic
2. On the TV show Ally McBeal, her therapist suggested she get a theme song. It changed over the years but I loved that she had a continual soundtrack theme to her life. One of the best examples was her boss John Cage’s (who suggested her therapist to her): Barry
3. How convenient to have as you would know which way not to turn because you would forewarned with sounds like this: the reveal
4. And Sheldon Cooper would appreciate this one: NOOOOOOO
5. And then the ultimate! Nevermind, I don’t like this one. I was just kidding. I call redo!!!!