Tag Archives: twitter

Warning: Passive Aggressive post ahead…. #crazyexes

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Warning: Passive Aggressive post ahead…. #crazyexes

I haven’t had time to do anything meaningful on here in many moons and this will not be truly mind-shattering either. There are lots of things in the world going on that I could write about, Ferguson, California Earthquakes, new ancient aliens episodes, rape culture, journalists being beheaded, etc. But those things are too heavy and I am feeling quite solipsistic. So instead I am taking this space to passive aggressively speak to a cyber stalker whom I (perhaps egotistically) believe will read it.

I have exes. Most of us do. But while I have engaged in some “harmless” ex-stalking in my day like casually checking out their public facebook profile photo just out of plain morbid curiosity, I can with all honesty state I have NEVER friend requested his or her new partner.

I do not want to be their pal. I do not want them to know I was sizing up them up as a previous partner.  

It has actually been sometime since I have done that regardless and I like to think that was due to some insecurity I have outgrown. 

Now, in the last year plus, I have had not one, BUT TWO of my partner’s exes cozying up to me in the cyber world. Really.

One sent threatening messages, showing her true 40+ year old age to be somewhere about 14, this was easily squashed with a magical feature called BLOCKING. No further contact. ¡Salud! 

Oh, but recently, the last month or so, another one popped up. Now mind you, I think my social media presence is ridiculously large, I concur. BUT I have things as locked down as the illusion of privacy permits (sans this blog) and most things have a fake name associated with them or require you need my REAL email to communicate. Well this one, I give her hacker search crazy bitch toolbox props cause she is EVERYWHERE.

On my twitter.

On my facebook.

On my tumblr.

On my instagram.

On my F**KING Pinterest. I had to disable it. I am very sad. Pinterest, get some better privacy settings. Sad face emoticon.

And when the above modes of contact were not successful, she started liking my things or communicating through my partner’s family members we had in common. So I had to delete THEM. That is not good in a newish relationship when you are trying to establish relationships with family members who live out of area, especially when THEY added you, now I just seem rude.

What can be gained of this for you?!

Yes, I can see from your very public disclosures you just got left recently by your partner.

I get it.

I am sorry, but….my partner isn’t available as a back up.

We are currently still together sooooo……

Get some counseling. Talk to a friend in real life. Focus on your kids. Focus on yourself. Self Care. Exes are exes for a reason. Truly.

If my partner wanted communication with you to continue, it would have.

And if that was your angle, um, why would you approach me, not them? Oh, that’s right. They deleted THEIRS cause of this.

DOH.

Stop it.

Just stop. 

Do they have methadone for Facebook addiction?

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Do they have methadone for Facebook addiction?

I am on day 4 since I killed my Fakebook. The first day was the hardest. But even today, when I turned on my computer I immediately typed in http://www.fakebook.com rather somatically. I didn’t log in. But I was tempted.

I feel good about it. It’s not forever but it’s for a while. It was becoming too much of a floatie for me….I feel a bit as though I am drowning in my life and I would like to be able to find the side of the pool without a floatie.

In my opinion, if you use a floatie, you never really learn to swim.

So I pulled the needle out of my arm.

I even threw away my rig.

Sigh.

I have had several phone calls from people and that has been magic. It’s really so WEIRD, hearing what people are saying and being able to get their intention just through their voices! So novel. No misunderstandings of tone or sarcasm! No waiting for a response. No wondering if my android is being dumb cause my house is a dead zone.

Honestly, I really think this phone thing might catch on.

Whoever invented it is going to be the next Zuckerberg, evil genius.

I should have bought stock in “phone.”

I might even see about doing that when I hang out IRL with some people today.  Is it insider trading if I share my plan with others? Hmmm.

Maybe I will just tweet about it.

You know, after I kick your ass in “Words with Friends.”

Warning! Solicitation for a good cause forthcoming:

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Warning! Solicitation for a good cause forthcoming:

I am participating again in the Cascade AIDS Project: AIDS Walk Portland on September 23, 2012. This year I am organizing my school’s team of walkers, something I am very proud to be able to do!

Personally, I walk because it gives me a chance to feel as though I am actually making a difference, even if it is only in one life, in one day. I personally love being able to fill the gaps in knowledge for teens and adults for that matter, in what HIV/AIDS is, how it is and IS NOT transmitted, that anyone can be affected and how it’s no longer a death sentence. Sharing that knowledge with people has given me more intrinsic rewards than anything I have ever done in my career.

I walk for my children. Working with HIV/AIDS populations have provided me an opportunity to model respect and the power of being informed to my children while also providing them the opportunity to be exposed to such a diverse group of individuals. My children have been set on a path of health and personal responsibility and that is something I can never replace.

I walk for my best friend, my friends and others like them living with HIV or AIDS. I can’t walk in their shoes, but I can damn sure walk for them.

Today, you can sponsor me here: http://www.aidswalkportland.org/cap/participantpage.asp?uid=7311&fundid=3069

If all of my followers donated just one dollar to sponsor me, I would meet my goal. If you donate more than a dollar, you are a rock star. Anything helps! The Cascade AIDS Project does amazing things.

And for this one dollar, I didn’t show you any starving children or mistreated animals. That is worth a dollar isn’t it?

Don’t make me break out the Sarah McLachlan….I’ll do it.

Only the lonely….

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Only the lonely….

L.M. Montgomery said that “Only lonely people keep journals.” I have to agree. I grew up keeping a diary which I later called a journal (so much more sophisticated) and a book of poems…I started in 4th grade. I found my solace and friends in books, regardless of who wrote them. We moved a lot and always lived in the middle of BFE, so my siblings and my horse were my only constant companions. Social scientists say now that we social media junkies are narcissists, that we think every thought we have is a gem. I don’t think I have breached that point, yet. I share a lot of news and observations, not a lot of  “I just ate a banana.” ” I just took a sh*t.” “I just turned on my computer,” crap. But I think it is more of a matter of loneliness we feel, wanting to feel connected to the world, rather than a matter of narcissism.

Now granted, I realize there is a generation full of wannabe Snookis and JWOWWs, but I am speaking of the people who aren’t fame seeking, oversharing whores. Just the ones who feel that they want to connect with someone besides themselves, to know that others feel the same way they do. Myself, I haven’t journaled truly since I got my first Myspace, I wrote a lot of notes then. I printed them off when I closed my account and I kept them in a notebook. Facebook has provided a sort of venting platform and twitter is amazing for quick little blips, updates and links to news stories.

BUT this blog: this blog has become my new journal. I still have my poetry book (number 4 at this point in my life) and I write in it often. I share a few of those poems here, but really they are mine. Not really fit for human consumption. Maybe after I am dead. I try to keep the blog knowledgeable for the masses, cathartic for me, and vague enough when referencing real people that only those people and a very select few realize whom I am actually speaking of. Its my mini-therapy.

I suppose I am lonely.

But you are reading this, so maybe you are too.

This world keeps getting smaller, yet the spaces between us keep on growing.

Love and light for Denver/Aurora…

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Love and light for Denver/Aurora…

I’m not going to spend a lot of time or energy writing about this, but I felt there were a couple of things that I needed to say. Someone that I care about was there in that theater when it happened and he is ok. Thank whatever you want to thank. He is a fantastic father of 4, one of my favorite musicians and a law student. He will be forever changed by this and my wish is that it is only for the better, that he will be able to deal with his emotions and heal.

That being said, all over the internet, Facebook, whatever are so many people saying “this is why we should all carry guns…” or something to that sentiment.

No.

Why would people be so insensitive to say something like that? One, more guns does not equal less problems. Two, a theater full of people with guns all trying to be a hero and take down a bad guy could have been as bad or worse that what happened. Three, way to encourage survivor guilt, you imbeciles.

I grew up around guns. Until the last 5 years, I have always had rifles for hunting and/or handguns for “protection.” Five years ago, I probably would have said I would always have guns. But when things like this happen, when you have a gun pointed in your face, when some of your best friends and people you care about suffer from straight up tragedies because of guns….You kinda get a bad taste in your mouth for them. I can’t believe how much my attitude on gun control has changed in the last few years.

Think about what you say people.  And then send your love and light onto those who really need it right now.

 

 

A casual observation about teenagers in the Pdx/Couv area

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A casual observation about teenagers in the Pdx/Couv area

Last night the girl child and I went to get supplies for a sundae bar for her and a amaretto sour bar for moi. While leaving the parking lot, she said “See all those kids coming from Wendy’s? That’s the new cool hangout for kids at my school.” so I looked, and saw what in my day would have been a group of kids behind Burger Den or Arctic Circle, hiding and smoking. What I realized was that none of them were and would have had difficulty if they tried, as both hands were on their cell phones, texting.

And then it struck me.

I haven’t seen any teenagers smoking in a long time, other than the occasional gutterpunk.

The teenagers I see that are walking, hiding, crouching, congregating, etc. always have cell phones in their hands.

It occurs to me now, as it did last night, that perhaps our need as teens to belong, to be cool, to be oral/tactically fixated is quenched by our texting and social media addictions.

Perhaps, in generations to come, carpal tunnel and curved cervical spine issues will be our problems caused by childhood needs to belong, rather than lung cancer and the related substance issues began by smoking.

I think I can be ok with that.

I believe it balances my dislike of cell phones as referenced here: WHY I HATE CELLS

Methinks perhapst I should rethink my stance on not allowing my kids to have cell phones until they have jobs to pay for them.

Maybe I don’t want them to find other things to do with their hands.

Hm.

To be fair, I will give you this as it still makes #Kony famous:

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To be fair, I will give you this as it still makes #Kony famous:

http://visiblechildren.tumblr.com.nyud.net/post/18890947431/we-got-trouble

This fellow believes we are doing the cause a disservice because of the amount of money that invisible children makes in relation to what they do. I know. I also know that NO effort is ever completely unselfish or without some sort of mutual benefit. I think the good outweighs the bad in this case and believe if nothing else, the fact that the web can be used to do such good and so quickly is inherent purpose enough. I mean this has gone BEYOND VIRAL.

And knowing this, I still bought schwag. It’s just as good a cause as any, plus it resonated with me on a level that few things do. That is all. Make your own choices.

I’m still going KONY2012.

As for the allegations he makes regarding not currently committing crimes in Uganda, perhaps. But that doesn’t mean crimes are not happening. Check it out:

http://www.lracrisistracker.com/

#KONY2012 (No other title seems appropriate)

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#KONY2012 (No other title seems appropriate)

I know the world is a terrible place with terrible people in it.

I also know the world is a wonderous place with wonderful people in it.

Sometimes, when I am caught up in my first world problems and feeling so full of self-pity, the Universe sends me something to remind me of my path and the content of my vision board; a contrast to show me I am a fat american pig with no real problems. I live a blessed life. And so do you. The fact that you are reading this tells me so.

Often, the Universe sends me things via one of my oldest friends and someone who knows me better than I know myself. Oddly, these things come just when I need them. Kismet, you might say.

I digress.

Regardless of how I come upon things, here is my call to action for you today. Just watch this and share it. Awareness is a start. Knowledge is all I am asking of you. 29 minutes of your time and a reblog.  A retweet. A Facebook share. An email.

Joseph Kony via Invisible Children

http://www.kony2012.com

http://www.invisiblechildren.com/frontline

Couples’ tattoos, a cursed thing….

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Couples’ tattoos, a cursed thing….

***UPDATE*****12/28/2012

I wasn’t brilliant. There are no loopholes. DO NOT ATTEMPT TO MAKE ONE.  DOH

Unless you are brilliant like me.

I’m sort of addicted to tattoos. Seriously. But I like to think of them as a diary I cannot lose. I have 14, if you count one cover up that only I and a certain tattoo artist are aware of.

But I remember where I was, who I loved, what I loved, who I was, what I was doing, how I was doing, where I was going and who I wanted to be when I got each and every one of my tattoos.

I don’t regret any of them, even the stupid ass thread, needle and art class misappropriated India ink one.

Even though mine is the only one who got to keep that one because I picked blue, everyone else’s went away within a couple damn weeks….

Even though it may have started on my chest and ended up migrating Southeast without the proper permissions later….

Meh, I digress.

Regardless, these are the rules for getting a tattoo with an other, be it friend, lover, spouse, whatever…

You have to get something meaningful that doesn’t involve names or dates.

They can’t match exactly.

And they have to conceptually ‘make something together, but be complete alone.’

And you have to have an artist that listens and knows what you want, works with it and doesn’t make you feel like a tool.

A fabulous artist like Chris Graham at Altered Reality.

Yay!

I can’t wait to get my next huge piece on my back, connecting 3 other tattoos….

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I’m kinda a big deal. Yeah.

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Check me and my bad self out.

http://ht.ly/9b528

That’s right. Demi-celebrity.

Bask in my birthday glow.