Tag Archives: politics

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder.

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Fuck you, Eddie Vedder.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for being my main boy/man archetype since I was 12.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for giving me hope. Hope that angry young men who hate their mothers and miss their fathers could grow up to be sensibly deep and poetic souls.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for narrating my youth and adolescence.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for giving me a voice and a growl to match my self-imposed angst.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for making me think that all angry young surfer/skater/artist boys would grow up to be passionate and well-adjusted adults.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for making me obsess over Matt Miller for years.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for having your lovingly familiar brow furrow.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for being my jokingly “8th ex husband” as I inch closer and closer to number 8.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for cutting your hair. It made Chris Cornell cut his! You bastard. Chris Cornell has the voice of an ANGEL.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for marrying a goddamn model and having a baby with her and having it be glorious.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for the soundtrack of Into the Wild, further complicating what I thought was a pivotal moment in my growth by proving that you angry boys could become men and could snap out of your melancholy to write something so provocative and insightful.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for influencing that vote of mine for Nader.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for making me love greasy rat men from Singles.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for all your mind opening documentaries and eye-opening activism.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for performing with Johnny Depp, which was a wet dream.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for Ukelele Songs, which made me love you even more.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, for my wedding song.

Sigh. Fuck you, Eddie Vedder.

I still love you.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder, because I would probably still marry you; if you and Jill don’t work out. Even though you are the same age as my mother. It’s not as weird, now that I am practically middle-aged.

But whatever.

Fuck you, Eddie Vedder.

Happy early fucking birthday, freaking Capricorns.

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Riddle me this Batman…

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Riddle me this Batman…

I am on a list that sends me updates when sex offenders move within a mile of my home. (mind you I live within a mile of THREE schools). In the last month I have had 4 updates of people moving into this mile radius of my house. So I check them out, see what they look like, read the charges (as I tend to care less about the young statutory cases) But the one I got today had the charge of “rape of a child” I wondered what that was…

RCW 9A.44.073

Rape of a child in the first degree.

(1) A person is guilty of rape of a child in the first degree when the person has sexual intercourse with another who is less than twelve years old and not married to the perpetrator and the perpetrator is at least twenty-four months older than the victim.

 

Two issues I have:

why is it Washington allows you to have sex with people 12 and older?

And why would it f**king matter if they were married to the perpetrator?

NO ELEVEN YEAR OLD SHOULD BE MARRIED!

Oy. The last three days I have lost such faith in the world.

White Privilege, it really does exist!

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White Privilege, it really does exist!

I recently had an interesting discussion with someone on their lack of belief in white privilege. It resulted in my leaving quite frustrated. I also tried to speak to my husband about it, but I end up so ver klempft that I can’t even banter appropriately or effectively. I have been trying to figure out a better and more clear way to explain it. The girl in the video explains it as immunity….rather than privilege…Maybe that makes it more palatable. I also have read an article that makes it understandable for the video generation….Click here.

One good thought I have had is: *if your perceived oppressive experience ends when you change environments, there wasn’t an *ism.*

You can be uncomfortable and a situational minority without being oppressed. 

Google “Galtung conflict triangle” interesting stuff. 2/3 isn’t an ism. You gots to have all 3.

http://civilliberty.about.com/od/equalrights/tp/Types-of-Oppression.htm

Socialism schism

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Socialism schism

I find myself feeling as though I need to defend everything I am and think, as if its all up for debate. This was something I posted on fakebook last night and one of the responses I received that was quite lovely.

And I leave you buttholes with this:

so·cial·ism noun \ˈsō-shə-ˌli-zəm\

Definition of SOCIALISM

1: any of various economic and political theories advocating collective or governmental ownership and administration of the means of production and distribution of goods
2: a : a system of society or group living in which there is no private property
b : a system or condition of society in which the means of production are owned and controlled by the state
3: a stage of society in Marxist theory transitional between capitalism and communism and distinguished by unequal distribution of goods and pay according to work done

Why yes, that’s right! It’s just another form of TAXATION! 

(WHICH GOVERNMENTS REQUIRE TO WORK.)

FUUUUUCCCCKKKKKK

As soon as I have enough to share more, I will. I promise. If I didn’t want to do my part, pay my share and be “socialist,” I’d have been a f**king counselor. Get off my nuts.

Explaining Socialism to a Republican

And this I just saw!

Baby Country Merikah

Veteran’s Day

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Veteran’s Day

Happy Veteran’s Day to my lovely husband, as he sits cussing at his Donkeys on the TV  I am glad he is here. Not there. For those still there, physically or otherwise, those going, those coming back, and everything after and in between, THANK YOU.

Have you thanked a veteran today? They are all around you. Young and old, broken and whole. Male and female, and every affectual orientation you can think of.

In Flanders Fields

In Flanders Fields the poppies blow

Between the crosses row on row,

That mark our place; and in the sky

The larks, still bravely singing, fly

Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago

We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,

Loved and were loved, and now we lie

In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:

To you from failing hands we throw

The torch; be yours to hold it high.

If ye break faith with us who die

We shall not sleep, though poppies grow

In Flanders fields.

By: Lt Col. John McCrae, MD (1872-1918)

 

 

Rape, abortion, politics and me.

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Rape, abortion, politics and me.

I read something earlier today that made me think a lot about the ramifications of a Romney led country; given the statements that have been made and the stances historically taken by the GOP. Many jokes have been made, gallows humor I suppose, about the white republican males knowledge of my genitalia and sensitive workings of which I couldn’t possibly be allowed to control, you know, as a woman.

But at the heart of it, I am fearful. And THAT frightens me.

I am frightened of what a Romney led Supreme Court could do to Roe v. Wade. To strides made in wage equality. To strides made in marriage equality. Veteran’s benefits equality. Military service equality. Equality in general.

And I also believe that I am rather experientially qualified to speak to a lot of it.

What in particular frightens me most is the seeming need to take away a woman’s right to choose if and when she can have an abortion. If and when she can have birth control and how much it will cost. Et cetera.

You see, my own mother was the product of a rape. And according to (R) Todd Akin, a “legitimate” one at that.  But her mother was poor. She was from backwoods Missouri and lived in a time when if you got a girl pregnant, you married her. So marry her rapist she did. She gave birth to my mother either right before or right after she turned 14. My mother was treated with hate and resentment by her own mother, a mother that was a scared and traumatized girl who was subjected to repeated abuse by an evil adult man. When my grandmother finally got away from him, she sent my mother and her little brother with him. My mother represented everything evil about her adolescent and teenaged years so instead of protecting my mother, she projected upon her. She rejected her repeatedly. She allowed her to be abused by him as well, however in her defense; I don’t know if she even realized what he was doing. This is the world my mother grew up in. This is why my mother is  irreparably broken. Why my mother will always be a child mother, as described by Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estes. She cannot deal with life in any healthy way. My mother allowed those cycles to continue. In her own misguided way, perhaps even facilitated them. Our family has a systemic history of sexual and physical violence.

I am a survivor of sexual abuse. I am a survivor of rape. I chose to have an abortion when I was 21, to terminate a pregnancy that was not the result of rape or incest and my life was not in danger. I simply could not afford another child and decided not to have it. As I sit here today, ripe with all my book learning and fancy education in social work and criminology, despite my lifelong passion and commitment to end the cycle of my own abuse, my own daughter was abused. But we are survivors, she and I. She is actually the one who inspired me to write this, as I am sure certain family members who could read this may be less than thrilled that I wrote it and am publishing it publicly. But I will not continue shame and secrets. Those things give power. I refuse to participate and facilitate. I now understand transgenerational trauma. My mother has never been anything but a victim in her eyes. She wouldn’t know how to be a survivor. She has never allowed herself to be validated as one. And after years of trying, I gave up on fixing her to follow my own path.

A path that had my grandmother been financially or theologically able to control; never would have been. She told me more than once when I was younger that she had prayed for a miscarriage, a stillborn, anything while she was pregnant. Had she been granted that, my mother never would have been born. I would have never been born. My daughter would never have been born. At least not in these specific situations. I have the benefit of my beliefs, which in the most simplistic of explanations are as follows: I believe in energy and the human need to name it and I also believe that energy never disappears, it merely changes. I also believe that we have some control before we are born in choosing our circumstances. This shapes my conscience the same as your beliefs shape yours.

So, in believing this way I can say that in some other way, I would have been born. Or maybe not. The baby I aborted? Was born later. I remember reading a Dean Koontz book once that had a boy who I believe was labeled as autistic, but in reality he was some amazing dimensional savant who, in one scene of torrential downpour, was walking with numerous other characters and yet he was the only one that didn’t get wet…When they asked him how he avoided the water, he replied “I just walked where it wasn’t raining.” I’ve digressed, but my point is that similarly to TV shows like “Fringe,””Lost” and any other amazing multiversal show created by JJ Abrams, every choice we make can be made different somewhere else. Theoretically, in some other dimension where my grandma was able to have an abortion, where she was allowed some semblance of a normal childhood and my mother was never born to her to be resented and broken, I was never born. My daughter in turn, never was either. And I am OK with that. That is a choice that I believe my grandmother should have been able to make.

But for a man, any man, who can never experience what it means to be carrying the product of a rape and be expected to love it and cherish it as a gift of some God to determine legally who can make that choice is absolutely wrong.

For a man, any man, who can never experience what it means to be carrying a child that you don’t want, can’t care for, are not ready for, know you will not be able to be a proper parent to and yet be expected to love it and cherish it the way it deserves because of how HE feels the LAW should be, is absolutely wrong.

I can see this issue from every female side. I do not understand how these men can dictate from a position of ignorance. Some of them are well educated. But they cannot know what it is like.

I am for equality, in all choices. To be able to choose whether you see a pregnancy which results from a rape as a blessing or a curse, to keep it, terminate it or put it up for adoption is the most intimate and difficult of choices. And it should be a personal one. And the same should be said about a pregnancy that is the product of a one night stand. A relationship. A birth control mistake. A statistical anomaly from perfectly taken birth control. A broken condom. It should not be one that is made in the legislature. It is not one that should be made by men who have no idea what is going on in a woman’s life.

Becoming a parent is a huge decision.

You know that bumper sticker that says “A world of wanted children would make a world of difference.” Ponder it for a moment.

Why would you force someone who wants an abortion to have and raise a child when you already believe they are wrong, misled or evil because they WANT an abortion? You already know they don’t want or have decided they can’t have the child. Otherwise, they wouldn’t want the abortion. Just slow down and think.

Human Rights courts have determined it is a violation of human rights to not allow someone who is raped to have an abortion.

So many things are going on in the government, in society, in the world that seems to be attempting to exert power over others. Has the pendulum really swung back so far that we are going to start going the other way? Are the men so worried women are going toward equal that they need to start oppressing us again? Sexually? Legally? From the vaginal ultrasounds before an abortion to Paul Ryan’s not even wanting IVF to be legal, we could be moving backwards. I just wish more people were understanding what could potentially happen. What the damage could be. Back alley abortions. Unreported rapes. More babies in dumpsters. Infanticides. Suicides. Should we bring back the foundling wheel?

Oy. I could go on and on. But I suppose I will close with a quote from Hillary Clinton: “I have met thousands and thousands of prochoice men and women. I have never met anyone who is proabortion.”

As if anyone wants to think about politics anymore.

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As if anyone wants to think about politics anymore.

But in case you do, I have a few little things to say.

I am still waiting for the Just for Men PR disaster  that I predicted last December. BUT as frightened as I am that Romney just might effing win, I must say that the Presidential election ISNT the only election that matters. WHEN Obama wins, he will be so much more able to do what he set out to do and wants to continue, if he has a Democratic majority house that will help him do it instead of a Republican led house that cock blocks him at every turn. YOU MUST VOTE for your Senators and Representatives, people!

A president is only as capable as the people around them allow them to be. If they are surrounded by people who will block bills and measures simply because there is an R or a D next to the writer’s name, we have a problem.

I don’t know how to fix that. Revolution perhaps?

Oy. That wont happen. We are a bunch of pansies, myself included. No one is storming the castle.

BUT we can make someone’s job easier by surrounding them with like minded policy creators. 

Women. Men. Children. People going to college. People going to public school. People in labor unions. LGBTQ HUMANS. HUMANS who want to be married. HUMANS who want to have kids and need IVF. HUMANS who DON’T want to have kids and need affordable birth control. HUMANS who are in labor unions. HUMANS who are going to college. HUMANS who want equality. HUMANS who want to make choices about their own HUMAN BODIES! HUMANS who have student loans. HUMANS IN GENERAL! PAY ATTENTION!

Just a thought.

Read something. Think about it. Fill in some bubbles. Vote. For all the seats. If you don’t know who to vote for and are unwilling to do the research, message me. I will tell you who to vote for. Think of me as your own personal magic 8-ball political ad. 🙂 

How about…

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How about…

I notice literally everyone in my world is having relationship issues, so I offer this. It’s, of course, through my lens but its a nice start because I am sure everyone who reads this is guilty of at least one:

Soooo how about:

  1. Not doing shit to begin with that you need to apologize for.
  2. Sincerely understanding how your actions affect and effect others and simply apologizing instead of glazing over things with gifts or silence.
  3. Shutting up and listening for a minute before you interrupt and argue.
  4. Realizing that just because someone is defensive doesn’t mean you didn’t cause it.
  5. Realizing that other people evolve and grow and change their views, it doesn’t mean that they have no conviction.
  6. Appreciating the differences in someone that you liked when you met them instead of being irritated with them.
  7. Looking up the definition of projection, transference, denial, oh f**k it, here: just read about defense mechanisms.
  8. Not being an asshole for a minute.
  9. Not making everything a fight.
  10. Being fully aware of the fact that people love you despite how you treat them but it’s getting old.
  11. Seeing the irony that you hate how you perceive people to treat others, but then you treat them the same way.
  12. Not being passive aggressive when you aren’t being antagonistic.
  13. Understanding that others give you as much space as you need to cool off, center, figure out what the hell is going on in YOUR head. Maybe you should extend the courtesy back.
  14. Consciously perceive that people are walking on eggshells because of how you react.
  15. Just shut the f**k up, period.

GAAAWWWDDDDDDDDDD

Love and light for Denver/Aurora…

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Love and light for Denver/Aurora…

I’m not going to spend a lot of time or energy writing about this, but I felt there were a couple of things that I needed to say. Someone that I care about was there in that theater when it happened and he is ok. Thank whatever you want to thank. He is a fantastic father of 4, one of my favorite musicians and a law student. He will be forever changed by this and my wish is that it is only for the better, that he will be able to deal with his emotions and heal.

That being said, all over the internet, Facebook, whatever are so many people saying “this is why we should all carry guns…” or something to that sentiment.

No.

Why would people be so insensitive to say something like that? One, more guns does not equal less problems. Two, a theater full of people with guns all trying to be a hero and take down a bad guy could have been as bad or worse that what happened. Three, way to encourage survivor guilt, you imbeciles.

I grew up around guns. Until the last 5 years, I have always had rifles for hunting and/or handguns for “protection.” Five years ago, I probably would have said I would always have guns. But when things like this happen, when you have a gun pointed in your face, when some of your best friends and people you care about suffer from straight up tragedies because of guns….You kinda get a bad taste in your mouth for them. I can’t believe how much my attitude on gun control has changed in the last few years.

Think about what you say people.  And then send your love and light onto those who really need it right now.

 

 

Slow your roll, my fellow ‘Merikaans.

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Slow your roll, my fellow ‘Merikaans.

Yes, they did vote 5-4 that Obamacare was not unconstitutional and that while they cannot force you to purchase insurance, they can tax you (read fine you) for not purchasing it.

Now, before you get your tea party panties in a bunch and start throwing money at Romney’s campaign like it’s a cotton candy scented stripper and making plans to have a Branch Davidian like compound, remember a couple things:

1: Every time you put on a seat belt or purchase a car with seat belts in it, the gov made you do that. Oh wait, no they didn’t. But if you don’t wear it, you most certainly can get a ticket.

2: When you get that said ticket, I hope to sweet ancient baby alien space monkey Jebus you have car insurance, cause the gov made you get that. Oh wait, no they didn’t. But if you don’t have it, you can go to jail. And have your money taken.

I could go on, but suffice it to say, THIS IS NOT THE END OF THE WORLD.

THIS IS A GOOD THING.

YOU WILL NOT DIE.

YOU WILL MAKE IT.

The Constitution will be ok.

Cause sweet ancient baby alien space monkey Jebus forbid we do anything nowadays that is different from what we did in the Year of our Lord, 1787.

Now go away, I must go to church, clean, cook, make babies and pray my husband doesn’t beat me.