Tag Archives: perspective

How could I forget?

How could I forget?

How much I love(d) Sarah McLachlan… whilst listening a soul sucking mean social media music provider, this song came on: Drawn to the rhythm and afterward I fell in a rabbit hole. The second CD that I ever bought was ‘fumbling towards ecstasy’. I think I was 13 or 14 and I spent the next few months with it on repeat constantly. I really felt connected to the words/songs and thought that they meant one thing, and I suppose then it did. I listened to the entire album today. I found myself instantly reconnecting. It was like visiting an old friend, one that you held secrets with and wax nostalgic but realize how much you’ve both changed. You realize with age and hindsight your previous way of understanding things are no longer the reality. 

To you at least, everything has changed and you have a hard time remembering what made you love them before, because you didn’t even know then, the things that make you love them now. Ha. Perhaps this doesn’t make anymore sense in written form than it did outloud, but in my mind it was quite a profound thought to me. 

Which led me to the train of thought about sharing things with friends or people you consider to wise, as you respect and value what they think and say. I’ve been having some pretty big contemplations as I’m want to do, as soon as things slow down, become complacent, comfortable (usually during the winter). I started thinking about the people that I would talk to then, and now, and the differences in how I would make decisions based upon what they would say. For example, I need to make a couple big decisions in the very near future and if I asked ten of my “go to people” (ha, ten is a stretch of people I would talk to about things) and how I could anticipate the ten, very different opinions they would give. They would be based on who they are, what they know about me, what they know about the situations, where they are in their own moods, lives, development, maturity, what they could have to gain or lose based on the outcome of the decision, etc. etc. etc.

And like the lyrics and meanings of songs, it’s all up to the listener’s present, their parallels to draw, their position to filter through. 

So how does one make a decision about big things? Do you meditate? Ask your parent? What if that’s not an option? Peers? Siblings? Bosses? Therapist? TAROT for goddess’s sake? (Which again, is just like the lyrics… concrete definitions are applied to the words which communicate the meaning of the song but what is heard and inferred, well… that’s on the listener.)

Who knows. Maybe I just think too much. Just watch the lovely Sarah not trying to guilt you into gifting to the ASPCA. Isn’t she beautiful? Ughhh it kills me. 



Is a magical thing.

I have been negligent of my blog, but before you try me for dereliction of duties, hear me out:

Like I let stress be my largest enemy;

Like how I let things get to me such as;

Like being poor at Christmas when I am not even a real celebrator of it; just a capitalist consumer of the BS;

Like needing to take a break but needing to find a new internship before next quarter starts;

Like wanting to read a stupid fluffy romance novel but needing to finish the last couple pages of my final Fall 2012 paper….I just cant seem to finish it…EEK;

Like being totally irritated at the fact I have used the word “like” so many times already;

Like the fact that I am writing this to procrastinate further the writing and eeking out of those last couple pages of aforementioned paper;

Like being totally and disproportionately upset that the stupid music channel is playing Christmas music.


If you are like me and need some perspective, take it from Carl Sagan:

You are both infinitely insignificant and infinitely made of star-dust.


Happy sweet ancient baby alien space monkey jebus/hanukkah/kwanzaa/solstice month/ whatever the hell you want to say.