Tag Archives: pacific northwest

The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men…..

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I had such plans for today!

Alas, Mother Nature had other plans.

 

So kiddos are home for a couple more hours.

I’m looking at the snow, it’s looking at me, and I want to seed the clouds with Lithium.

So in honor of rolling with the punches, I give you music for the snowy soul (atleast it’s not rain yet!):

Yeah ah ey yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh……

Perhaps my Spring Break will be better tomorrow.

I like it, I’m not gonna crack……..

But I would like to sing a different song tomorrow:

Spring…is here…..again…..

Maiden Mother Crone

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Maiden Mother Crone

I just had an epiphany while lost in deep near meditative thought (is that an oxymoron? meditative thought….hm). Anyhoo…I realized that since my move to the Pacific Northwest last June, I hadn’t really made any friends. Now partially, this is because I haven’t really tried; it is also a self-imposed-quasi-societal-restraint. I really don’t like many females, never have had many female friends (I’ve dated women, but only long enough to realize I really can’t get along with them) and find myself better friends with males…HOWEVER while in a relationship with a man having old male friends is uncomfortable enough, making new ones is just plain drama.

I don’t care how secure your ‘man” is, you start bringing around new guy friends that aren’t gay and it causes static. At least that has ALWAYS been my experience.

I digress….

What was my point? Oh yes. Females. Women. Girls. Ladies. Chickas. La Feminina…

I haven’t made any new female friends.

That is until recently. Perhaps it is simply the fact that I am in school again and have the opportunities to meet more people or perhaps it is something else. I like to believe that every relationship happens for a reason. Even the bad ones. You learn something about yourself, others, life, whatever. There is a point. When it seems like you have the same relationships over and over, you have somehow MISSED the intended point. So it is presented again in a slightly different albeit similar packaging. Similar enough to be comforting and disarming, different enough to be new and novel. This can happen repeatedly until you get it right and no longer need to attract that same cycle, because you have already mastered it.

Well, in my oxymoronic state as mentioned above, I realized that I am now in the midst of a triad!

A fantastical triad that appeals to my spiritual self.

Maiden. Mother. Crone.

It’s not just a tattoo on my back anymore!

*Now, if the women I am about to talk about actually read this, I hope they are not offended. I am not calling one naive or one old.*

That is not my intent at all so with that caveat lector, let me explain:

The first person I met from my triad, I met this summer at the Cascade Aids Project Aids Walk. We bantered a little, but not much. She is about 8 years younger than I, I think, and married military. No kids. She reminds me of who I think I would have been had I not got married and had kids when I was a kid. She is my maiden. Not because she is naive, but because she is wise and independent and is learning about herself as much as I hope I am finally.

The second person from my triad, I met in a class. She intimidated me but reminded me in energy and spirit of my best friend, Rachael, in Idaho. I was attracted to her and probably freaked her out in the beginning. She is former military, divorced, no kids. She reminds me of who I would have been had I not got married and had kids when I was a kid. She is my crone. Not because she is old, but because she is wise and independent, knows herself as well as I hope to someday.

I, by way of luck, am the mother. I’m right in the middle, divorced then married military, and a mother of a boy child and a girl child. Hopefully there is some reciprocity between us all. I think it is pretty much Kismet that we are all in the same program at such varying stages of our lives.

I also seem to have made a few other female friends in the last couple weeks just by following my gut, including my newest neighbor that was looking at a different house and I kinda went out on a limb and showed her a different house, completely unsolicited. I am excited to start having block parties.

I have never made female friends so easily. I am growing! YAY!

I’m attracting all sorts of feminine energy into my world….

Whoda thunk.

Yeah you caught me looking at ya, so whatareya gonna do about it?

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Just a quick little confessional, devoid of digression for our almost new year ponderings….

I am freaking blind so I have to wear glasses. I prefer contacts, but living in the Pacific Northwest I find there is not a lot of reason to wear contacts other than vanity because I rarely NEED sunglasses. However, I am rather vain so I wear contacts most of the time, ergo, I wear sunglasses if for no other reason than an accessory, habit or wishful thinking.

Because of this, I have grown quite adept at people watching and keeping my mouth from revealing the thoughts which my eyes cannot hide.

Herein lies the problem.

When the occasion happens I am too lazy, too late or just don’t give a sh*t, and I am wearing my glasses, I forget they have clear lens.

I glare.

I say “F**K YOU” with my eyes.

I say “I’d f**k you” with my eyes.

I roll my eyes.

I look out of the corner of my eyes all batsh*t crazy without turning my head to stare you down in the car next to me at the light.

I do any number of things, assuming I’m safe because you can’t see me.

Except when I forget that you can.

Then I am busted.

I turn red. (Which is a whole different level of red for me, anyone that knows me can attest to my scarlet brilliance….)

I feel dumb.

I come home and blog away all my “caught in the act” voyeuristic shame.

Tee hee.

Anyone else do this?

Don’t lie.

Anyone else get CAUGHT?