Unexpectedly, in my way;
Offering truth and love, for my consideration.
Reciprocating, in my way;
Giving freedom and beauty, for your consideration.
All the things I believed I had brought,
I really came for…
All the things you believed you lacked,
You were really blessed with…
You gave me a lantern.
I gave you the map.
I have officially finished the severing of all ties….insurance and cell phone are in my name alone and connected to my bank account, again.
No one can demand information about things associated with my phone/phone bill, no one can guilt me about paying for those things while I am “just” finishing grad school.
Saturn retrograde be damned.
- I have a state job, ergo I can pay all my own damn bills again.
- I have an MSW, ergo I never ever, ever have to think about homework again.
- I again have complete responsibility and autonomy over my life again, ergo there is only myself to consider when feeling guilt, if I so choose to.
I am not saying it is bad for people to put themselves in situations where they trust and depend on other people, per se…..
It’s just not a place I like to live.
And it will NOT take me 5 times to figure that shit out.
To paraphrase the words of good ol’ scapegoat Dubya….”Fool me once, shame on you…fool me 4 times….well you know….I won’t get fooled again!”
Welcome back, Just Jani!
So as lame as it makes me feel to admit this, I have a confession to make.
I identify entirely too much with the following songs; however not in all of the exact imagery chosen by the video directors…That is my one caveat…I think acknowledging this in a public forum makes me accountable for the awareness. It is what it is.
I grew up idolizing “Me and Bobby McGee”….and I suppose I continued the trend within myself 🙂
C’est la Vie.
“…pushed me to a nomadic point of madness that both dazzled and dizzied me.”
“My mother told me I had a chameleon soul, no moral compass pointing due north, no fixed personality; just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide and as wavering as the ocean…”