Tag Archives: entertainment

Whoroscopias

Standard
Whoroscopias

Sometimes I really really love Rob Brezsny’s horoscopes 🙂 check them out: http://www.freewillastrology.com/horoscopes/

 

I needed this one this week.

 

A. Because I need a muthatruckin J-O-B and;

B. I do have someone that looks at me like Lindsey looked at Stevie sooooo…. intention is magic.

 

Pisces (February 19-March 20)
“Take a lover who looks at you like maybe you are magic,” says the poet Marty McConnell. That’s good advice, Pisces — not just in regards to your intimate relationships, but about all your other alliances, too. If you’re seeking a friend or consultant or business partner or jogging companion or new pet, show a preference for those creatures who look at you like maybe you are magic. You always need to be appreciated for the sweet mystery and catalytic mojo you bring to your partnerships, but you especially need that acknowledgment now. “

Advertisements

Oddly disconnected.

Standard
Oddly disconnected.

You pulled up next to me today. It was weird that I even looked over. Usually I am staring ahead watching the lights but I happened to look over and noticed you. You looked ridiculously pensive as per normal; however you got a new car!

What is that? Your 4th in 15 months? How DO you manage? And such an expensive one as well….

Huh. Kudos, I guess.

It’s not nearly as awesome as my Hamster car though…

Bouli Bouli.

two weeks eh? Dang.

Standard
two weeks eh? Dang.

So maybe I have been slightly distracted by life and slowly becoming more distracted…

I hadn’t realized it had been two freaking weeks since I blogged. EEEEP….

But the return is worth it…for example:

I smile for no reason and when no one is there to observe it;

I’m busy as hell between FT work, kids, new friends, old friends, my lovely new boyfriend, etc;

I am running in the run for your lives event tomorrow (my second year!);

I’m also trying to figure out how to cut costs and make extra money….. if you have legal ideas, hit me up cause at this point I am thinking commune….;

My fantasy football draft is tonight *fingers crossed*;

My kids are amazing and responsible and I can do things without a babysitter and they don’t throw rocking parties (YESSSSSSSS)…;

My student loans are arranged to start next week and be $39.45 a month for the next 108 years;

I haven’t killed all of my plants;

I have been writing again, a lot… I have no idea where I find the time….

Andddddd I got to see the Silent Comedy do Fleetwood Mac and dance with said boyfriend.

What else could a woman want?

xoxo

Jani

 

 

 

Body electric

Standard
Body electric

Ok, Ok… so I have almost gotten Lana Del Rey out of my system BUT! I wasn’t able to get an entire album onto one disc, so I have only been listening to the one. Today I decided to listen to the other one with a measly 4 songs on it and lo and behold; she has a song called Body Electric which is a throw back to my favorite Whitman poem

OMG I love her fucking face.

She is one of my soul mates I am sure of it now.

xoxo

Jani

Confirmation Bias, perhapst…..

Standard
Confirmation Bias, perhapst…..

Have you ever had one of those moments where you are remembering something you previously thought or said when suddenly something specifically interacts with you regarding it? I’m sure it is some sort of confirmation bias, part of the reason that divining tools and/or oracles seem spot on… You hear what you need to or are supposed to or are receptive to… right?

Ok, so riddle me this, Batman…

You know that place between dreaming and awake? When you are still responsive to the world for the most part but also starting to dream? Yeah. So there I am, there being a subjective ethereal term… and I am remembering a conversation I had about a recent tarot reading and the continuing conversation about a certain song’s potentially related lyrics and how it was super sweet and what I wanted….blah blah blah girl crap…. fast forward back to dreamspeaking state….

and that song comes on.

It was kinda awesome. It even took me a second to process it actually was playing outside of my dreamy state. HA

Yes, I know it doesn’t mean anything, per se….

But it was badass nonetheless.

 

sympatico

Standard
sympatico

Ruminative on synchronistic evolutions;

almost growing paranoid by each shared thought.

Such interesting revelations;

drawn by each obscure reference caught.

Reciprocality in physical and mental states;

asks us to avoid habitual over-musing.

Chemically enhanced binaural beats;

stay present, speed can make it more confusing.

Rhythms in compatible energies can be misleading;

but sometimes they are also psychogenic.

Just because something happens to come easy, 

does not allude that it can’t be authentic.

Fear isn’t the only immortal enemy;

questioning the wisdom in another chance.

Like control, it too is just an illusion; 

It is what it is, just dance.

Ten things you never knew you needed to know about me.

Standard
Ten things you never knew you needed to know about me.
  1. I will go 2 miles out of my way driving to finish listening to something on the radio.
  2. I think the Cure sucked after Disintegration.
  3. I make up burlesque routines in my head to songs often; but I will most likely never perform one IRL.
  4. I have a stack of coloring books and crayons that I use. (What?! Canvas is expensive, yo.)
  5. I hate Chuck Taylors. They hurt my feet. Always have.
  6. When I was young, I wanted to be Tiffany. (No really. Why do you think I started dyeing my hair dark red?)
  7. I fucking rock at crosswords (even the NYT) and I think doing crosswords together is romantic. New Capt. Kirk gets it.
  8. My second favorite Pearl Jam song is “Wishlist” and my favorite line from wishlist is “I wish I was the full moon shining off a Camaro’s hood.”
  9. If I had nuts, I would give my left one to go to the Saints vs. Seachickens game on Dec. 2nd, 2013; alas, I have none. Sadface. (Cassie? Yevett? Megan? I am looking at YOUUUUUUUUU)
  10. When I was 16 I flunked philosophy 101 at BSU. When I was 28, I got an A+ in philosophy 101, 102 and 201. Only F I ever got. Bothered me to no ends for years. I had to go big.

 

The people in the basement…

Standard
The people in the basement…

Here is an OLD one!

See, in my own way I was always going to be a social worker. Look at that natural social justice insight! *oy vei*

There’s an imaginary dog downstairs,

I hear it barking.

A psycho has fantasies about me,

and thinks that they’re real.

I met a child yesterday,

she had one this morning.

Just a few pieces of paper,

what’s the damn deal?

A flying or ground attack,

trample and rampage of one.

Electromagnetic motor,

fucking up my reception.

Vegetarian vampires whisper,

“I’ve fast for too long…”

Tossing memories without sequence,

back when we were spun.

I heard her cry again,

this afternoon around two;

Swearing to leave

“You rapist bastard!”

A flower grew, bloomed, and died,

all in three weeks.

There was a kitten lost,

somewhere around Jefferson and 3rd.

A pill I call Alice

and her friend Maryjane.

The guy in my dreams,

versus my own mind’s eye.

I lined them all up,

they still fought over who gets first.

Didn’t they say it’d be fair?

I must have already been high.

I hear her calling him,

back home again.

Kathy needed a friend,

so I called her a slut.

It’s always purple here,

spring, summer, and fall.

What the hell?

I hate that fucking mutt.

© 7/6/1996

Complete with theme song…..

Standard
Complete with theme song…..

I don’t know if I am grandiose or not,

When I first meet people I catch myself making up some sort of recipe;

A fictional psychosocial evaluation on them

which becomes their individual narrative in my mind,

*This is guided of course by what I think I know of people, think i know of social work, think I know of psychology, think that I read on their body language, or learned in life, learned reading a book, learned by being the one that could shut the fuck up; observe & mimic other people in order to blend in like a chameleon, in  new and/or uncomfortable situations for safety)

Meh, I digress…

Anyway, your narrative (and by “your” I mean you who are reading this had I met you or when I met you, not anyone person in particular) that I create in my head is how I related to you until I learn more and start replacing my humble conjecture with relayed facts;

But I admit, sometimes, I feel like a superhuman;

Like I must be psychic or an empath or Dr. Xavier;

e.g. Sookie Stackhouse trying to ignore the thoughts she really does NOT want to hear;

Sometimes, I find out that through many of the facts people share with me;

Actually align pretty well with the totally fictional made up backstory I spun them. It’s very unsocialworky of me.

I mean, what do I have to go on in talking to people for only a few minutes? I can see their eyes, their hands, their voice, their body language, their tone, etc….It’s totally inappropriate for me to create their whole backstory based on a few minutes interaction…

Do other people do that?? They must. I hope they do; otherwise, I probably sound a bit like a loon.

I am sure it is merely some sort of experienced/educated projection….some fancy defense mechanism that allowed observant and smart people to reproduce…skills that are not being passed down today because we are so distracted and looking down into a portable rabbit hole…WHOA, speaking of rabbit holes…

Sorry, I’ll spare you the self disparaging rant.

Anyhoo, like…maybe I have this social worker lens,

Seventies television show idea of each new person I meet’s whole life….

If I did, it could be something as follows:’

Complete with theme song *wink*

Baby of large family

The smallest Brady no one mentioned

Grew up wanting a family

Baby sister

Baby brother

Someone to take care of

Someone to have your back

 Just wanted to be someone’s hero

Wanted to be a soldier;

a fireman;

a teacher;

a doctor;

Found a family there

People to look up to you

Someone to share first memories with…

Your substitute hard drive

 Exhausted and rejuvenated finally fell in love

Family wasn’t there

Decided to go back there and then came home

Moved onto another

A Betty Crocker Readymade family to love

To replace the one you didn’t know yet to want

But it just didn’t fit

You internalized the blame 

 Then as you got older

You realized you needed more ways to go back,

So through trial and error,

Sex and beer,

Adrenalin, fighting, racing, speed

Went back in different ways to reestablish:

yourself, your worth

All the familiar roles

Pride and admiration

Understanding of experience

Validation for your work

Found your family

In more than one way.

Who knows.

Maybe I am grandiose and plain ol’ crazy.

I can spin a good back story though.

C’est la vie.

XOXO

Jani

Jessica

Standard
Jessica

I really didn’t have anything to offer this morning so I went through my journals to find something to post.

This was written 13 years ago today. 

I definitely have cyclical themes in my world. GD it.

I apparently haven’t learned much in those 13 years. DOH

(At least my writing got better….)

 

Jessica

 

I called you earlier today,

they said you weren’t there.

I said it didn’t matter, my love,

I said I didn’t care.

 

I think of you with her,

I die a little with each thought.

But you, my love, shall never know

the tears of jealousy I have fought.

 

You say that you love only me,

I’m yours inside your heart;

So why are you still with her, my love,

and why are we apart?

 

It’s so unfair to me, I feel,

she holds you in her arms.

But time and time again, my love,

she burns you with her charms.

 

This was so much easier yesterday,

before she had a name.

The ease with which I wait, my love,

shall never be the same.