Tag Archives: driving

Engine light

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Engine light

“Navigator” is an important role…

But so is “Driver”.

Both must give up control of many aspects…

But trust that both intend to arrive at the agreed destination…

Hope; that both travel in the same direction…

at similar speeds…

attitudes and road games can cause wear and tear…

upon both the vehicle and the occupants…

GPS often requires signals that can get lost…

Sometimes you just need to pull over and look at the map.

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My Artesian soul…..

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And I realized in that moment,

It wasn’t you who had changed.

It wasn’t the “us” that was different.

It was me giving you the benefit:

The benefit of my artesian soul,

which had recently been refilled

to the brim.

Not unlike a geyser spouts,

it spilled over into us.

I feel like an eddy,

The tornado around the drain.

I lose my pressure around you.

Nothing even percolates.

It’s flat.

Huh.

I thought it was you.

But it was me.

It was him.

It was there.

I must rediscover the source.

 

Sexiest damn song. I had forgotten. It’s what was playing when I wrote this in my head.

The best-laid schemes o’ mice an’ men…..

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I had such plans for today!

Alas, Mother Nature had other plans.

 

So kiddos are home for a couple more hours.

I’m looking at the snow, it’s looking at me, and I want to seed the clouds with Lithium.

So in honor of rolling with the punches, I give you music for the snowy soul (atleast it’s not rain yet!):

Yeah ah ey yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh……

Perhaps my Spring Break will be better tomorrow.

I like it, I’m not gonna crack……..

But I would like to sing a different song tomorrow:

Spring…is here…..again…..

TRIMET safety? Yeah…..

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TRIMET safety? Yeah…..

So again there was a robbery on the max train I ride.

http://www.kxl.com/02/08/12/Robbery-On-A-Max-Train/landing.html?blockID=585764&feedID=10446

Awesome. I would just like to say that not ONCE have I seen a Trimet police officer on my train (unless they were hiding in plainclothes…yeah right…) or a real police officer or even a fare checker.

I’m not buying it. http://www.portlandtribune.net/news/story_2nd.php?story_id=132831962929253100

I was late to school just the other day because some stupid &*%**%* decided to buy 8375346530465 tickets individually and I didn’t have any tickets left in my packet. So I missed my train to get one. I should have just rode illegal like everyone else besides the person that hogged the machine. My husband hates me riding it, my brother wants me to get my concealed weapons in this state. My stress levels just from thinking about you bastards is rising. I do not feel safe on the train, especially at night in the free fare zone (which has pretty much become the whole goddamn route.) Granted I don’t go through the “roughest” neighborhoods, but I do go through downtown and the “transitioning” neighborhoods, which look lovely during the day but at night are totally different places.

I wear my sunglasses. I avoid eye contact. I ignore your attempts to solicit my conversation. I wear my ear buds, low so I can hear whats going on, and I sit with my back to the wall so no one is behind me. But I see and hear all the things you crazy, high and scary bastards do. Chanting about Jesus and Satan in the schools and demon lunch ladies. Sitting on the bus with your tent over your head rocking and chanting. Shit makes me nervous. What are you doing under there? Are you harmless? Scared of people? or loading your shit? GOD. I smell your pot. I smell the meth oozing from your pores. Making drug deals next to me. talking about who you are gonna eff up if you see them at the Alberta stop again.

Seriously. I am listening and I have supermagical hearing abilities. I don’t want to listen but I have to so I know wtf is going on around me. And I have my mace ready. I swear I am gonna end up macing myself on accident. FUCK

I don’t carry anything but books and bus passes. Leave me alone.

*adult language alert* The attempted fleecing of me, eff you Jiffy Lube.

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*adult language alert* The attempted fleecing of me, eff you Jiffy Lube.

So I never in a million years thought I would say I miss Mooner. 🙂 But I do. I miss Mooner and Twin Falls Jiffy Lube. I took my car in today, it was time and my boss will be riding in my car so I decided to get it vacuumed out, oil change, and new windshield wipers (stupid Pacific Northwest rain). PLUS I had a coupon for the Signature Service at $19.99 and buy one get one free windshield wipers, blah blah…

Mind you I have never had a problem at the Fisher’s Landing location until today.

First, they tell me it is illegal to blow out my air filter. Fine whatever, I haven’t had a new one in a bazillion years. 10 bucks whatevs.

Then they tell me that I need a new “radiator cap gasket” because I only have 7# of pressure, but lucky for me, they have a special running and its only $50 dollars. Are you fucking kidding me? FIFTY DOLLARS???? Do I look hot and stupid? I’m not even blond right now! I guess in this dress you can’t see my “all knowing mechanically minded dick.” I say “No, I think I will be alright. But thanks.”

He goes on to try and scare me into buying it, with threats of thrown rods (um, do you know which gasket we are talking about Mike from jiffy lube?), thermostat woes and radiator failure, car overheating apocalypse. I say “No, really, I am sure.”

Then they go to ring me up and magically, they no longer honor my Shell/jiffy lube card. Really? The one nice employee there, Bernard, tries for 45 fucking minutes to get it to work but they have a new card reader that no one can figure out. aWHesome. Emphasis on the WH. Like cool WHip. Meh, I digress.

So finally after getting really fucking irritated I use my previously just paid off credit card to pay so I can leave.

I get in my car and leave only to realize that:

1) There are oily foot prints ALL OVER MY DRIVER SIDE UPHOLSTERY-SIDE MAT;

2) Those mutherfuckers didn’t even VACUUM which was the whole damn point of getting my oil changed today;

3) Bernard got an ear full and I hope he slaps his employees for being stupid tools.

So I woosaw….I got to my local Baxter’s Autoparts store and purchase an entire new radiator cap for 7 dollars.

I win.

Fuck you Jiffy Lube Fisher’s Landing. Atleast you didn’t try and interest me in new muffler bearings and a refill on my blinker fluid.

Snow Schmow, have you checked your muffler bearings this winter?

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I can not believe how people react here from the “threat” of snow. Seriously? You guys are closing 3/4 of the schools for a TRACE of snow? OMG

Dear sweet ancient baby alien space monkey Jebus. Save us from the Yuppies with Subarus.

Where I grew up, we drove through drifts that would touch the side mirrors to get to school.

In the school buses.

In our cars.

In our trucks.

We did brodies in the parking lots and learned to appreciate a good E-brake pull.

Girls drove trucks.

EVERYONE learned to drive stick.

And this isn’t one of those, “I walked to school uphill both ways, barefoot in the snow, 87 miles everyday” type of stories. I’m from McCall.  Google that shit. In all reality, I think we had a snow day 2x the whole time I went there and 1x when my kids went.

Snow day in PDX? Pssh, forget about it.

This is not snow.

This is slightly frozen rain.

You guys are weenies.

Commuters are even bigger weenies. A 1 hour commute becomes almost 3 hours because the road is wet.

Uh, this is the Pacific Northwest. Are you really scared of wet roads? Serious?

If I woke up tomorrow and there was 3 feet, ok then. Close the schools and I won’t go anywhere either because you Pacific NWers can’t drive for shit.

Four wheel drive does not mean four wheel stop.

Automatics are not better because they may be all wheel drive or even front wheel drive. A real snow driver wants a stick so if you do end up stuck, you can rock that bitch out of most anywhere.

I digress.

And for those of you stocking up at the store, making me stand in line 45 minutes for my damn creamer and whiskey, don’t forget to buy some tire chains. You will need them, there is a chance of 2 inches of snow. OH! And you might need to check your muffler bearings. And your blinker fluid. Goddess knows you don’t want to be stuck in a snow bank without blinker fluid, how will your GPS work!

*Eyeroll*

Call me when global warming starts.

Yeah you caught me looking at ya, so whatareya gonna do about it?

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Just a quick little confessional, devoid of digression for our almost new year ponderings….

I am freaking blind so I have to wear glasses. I prefer contacts, but living in the Pacific Northwest I find there is not a lot of reason to wear contacts other than vanity because I rarely NEED sunglasses. However, I am rather vain so I wear contacts most of the time, ergo, I wear sunglasses if for no other reason than an accessory, habit or wishful thinking.

Because of this, I have grown quite adept at people watching and keeping my mouth from revealing the thoughts which my eyes cannot hide.

Herein lies the problem.

When the occasion happens I am too lazy, too late or just don’t give a sh*t, and I am wearing my glasses, I forget they have clear lens.

I glare.

I say “F**K YOU” with my eyes.

I say “I’d f**k you” with my eyes.

I roll my eyes.

I look out of the corner of my eyes all batsh*t crazy without turning my head to stare you down in the car next to me at the light.

I do any number of things, assuming I’m safe because you can’t see me.

Except when I forget that you can.

Then I am busted.

I turn red. (Which is a whole different level of red for me, anyone that knows me can attest to my scarlet brilliance….)

I feel dumb.

I come home and blog away all my “caught in the act” voyeuristic shame.

Tee hee.

Anyone else do this?

Don’t lie.

Anyone else get CAUGHT?

Trading kiddos for Christmas

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is never a fun task but all went well today, safe and sound are we.

Much less dramatic now that the children are older. My kids too. 😛

And luckily, I LOVE his wife. She makes my world much brighter.

I digress.

I appreciate that I don’t have to do “the drive” twice a month anymore (an hour each way) BUUUUTTTT driving 4 hours each way now 8 times a year is LAME.

I shall write something worthwhile tomorrow….right now I are EX-hausted.

Merry “whatever you choose to read in this spot”!