Tag Archives: batshitcrazy

Warning: Passive Aggressive post ahead…. #crazyexes

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Warning: Passive Aggressive post ahead…. #crazyexes

I haven’t had time to do anything meaningful on here in many moons and this will not be truly mind-shattering either. There are lots of things in the world going on that I could write about, Ferguson, California Earthquakes, new ancient aliens episodes, rape culture, journalists being beheaded, etc. But those things are too heavy and I am feeling quite solipsistic. So instead I am taking this space to passive aggressively speak to a cyber stalker whom I (perhaps egotistically) believe will read it.

I have exes. Most of us do. But while I have engaged in some “harmless” ex-stalking in my day like casually checking out their public facebook profile photo just out of plain morbid curiosity, I can with all honesty state I have NEVER friend requested his or her new partner.

I do not want to be their pal. I do not want them to know I was sizing up them up as a previous partner.  

It has actually been sometime since I have done that regardless and I like to think that was due to some insecurity I have outgrown. 

Now, in the last year plus, I have had not one, BUT TWO of my partner’s exes cozying up to me in the cyber world. Really.

One sent threatening messages, showing her true 40+ year old age to be somewhere about 14, this was easily squashed with a magical feature called BLOCKING. No further contact. ¡Salud! 

Oh, but recently, the last month or so, another one popped up. Now mind you, I think my social media presence is ridiculously large, I concur. BUT I have things as locked down as the illusion of privacy permits (sans this blog) and most things have a fake name associated with them or require you need my REAL email to communicate. Well this one, I give her hacker search crazy bitch toolbox props cause she is EVERYWHERE.

On my twitter.

On my facebook.

On my tumblr.

On my instagram.

On my F**KING Pinterest. I had to disable it. I am very sad. Pinterest, get some better privacy settings. Sad face emoticon.

And when the above modes of contact were not successful, she started liking my things or communicating through my partner’s family members we had in common. So I had to delete THEM. That is not good in a newish relationship when you are trying to establish relationships with family members who live out of area, especially when THEY added you, now I just seem rude.

What can be gained of this for you?!

Yes, I can see from your very public disclosures you just got left recently by your partner.

I get it.

I am sorry, but….my partner isn’t available as a back up.

We are currently still together sooooo……

Get some counseling. Talk to a friend in real life. Focus on your kids. Focus on yourself. Self Care. Exes are exes for a reason. Truly.

If my partner wanted communication with you to continue, it would have.

And if that was your angle, um, why would you approach me, not them? Oh, that’s right. They deleted THEIRS cause of this.

DOH.

Stop it.

Just stop. 

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Septic and in need of a Master Cleanse? Me too.

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First a poem.

Then a rant.

No digress.

Septic

I want my old skin back,

I’m no longer comfortable under yours.

Open sores need to breathe to heal and I know, I know,

I can’t always be the band-aid,

infections they feed this sickness between us;

It’s been allowed to fester into a boil.

I drew my sword and lanced it

now it’s become septic in unsterilized soil.

Too much attention given at the wrong stage.

An ulcer allowed to develop into pointless rage

Who knows what could have been.

Is this leper’s piece yours or mine?

A necessary quarantine and emotional quinine

A couple of courses, we should both be fine.

Master Cleanse:

Tomorrow the hubby and I are starting a “Master Cleanse.” For those of you shut-ins that are truly shut-in or haven’t subscribed to Gwyneth Paltrow’s www.goop.com, for informative and entertainment reasons here is the breakdown:

Basically, for approximately 3-30 days you starve yourself under the guise of a detox which includes laxative teas, “lemonade” made of fresh lemon juice, pure water, cayenne pepper (seriously) and real maple syrup. Occasionally, you drink some nice sea salt water too. In the meantime, your body “cleanses” itself, and is allowed to do more important things like flushing your liver and junk instead of digesting all the CRAP we non-agrarian/non-hunting lazy ass americans eat. Granted, my family doesn’t eat bad, comparatively speaking, but compared to neolithic man, we are ridiculously suicidal with our habits. So some things I have read praise sweet ancient baby alien space monkey Jebus for the Master Cleanse. Others say it is the most horrible thing ever. Hallucinogenic in a bad way I have even read. We shall see. No coffee or caffeine? Oh my dear lord. I am pretty good at going without eating for days, which is totally healthy I know. But it’s effective…..Meh just kidding. Kinda….

I digressed. Oops.

Anyway, The goal is 10 days, I am hoping to make it to 7. I may not be able to do it and go to school which is why I am adding the caveat of 7….Husband is hoping to kick nicotine as a result of it, before everyone in our family adopts a much different eating style…MUAHAHAHH i win suckas…..:P

I shall update you as we go, and if you all don’t mind, if my posts get more crazy than normal…help a girl out. Give a heads up that I need to eat something cause I have gone bat shit crazy. Thanks *kisses*