And in those thoughts, I find myself again looking at the results of particular decisions and paths that I have been feeling unsure of lately. But in this examination with the benefit of hindsight, I find that I am ok with my world right now.
*Forgive my vagueness in the forthcoming thoughts, but I really don’t want to expose anyone’s stuff on my blog.*
For example, we all (in my experience anyway) want to do things differently than our parents, whether in a huge way or a small way. Sometimes, we find ourselves as parents seeming to repeat our parent’s mistakes or even doing things “worse” in our perception. But after a crisis, with the added layer of experience and evolution of thought we sometimes can look at something we think we were doing wrong and realize we did it right. We just didn’t know it then. Perhaps something that your parent did and exposed you to, allowed to happen, taught you to teach your children something different that people found particularly developmentally inappropriate, something kids should not be exposed to in order to save their innocence of thoughts. But because you taught them, because you told them something earlier than the experts suggest: you taught them to address a problem rather than to hide it and allow it to permeate their childlike minds.
Perhaps in another situation, what you felt you were teaching your children was to be compliant and to be passive aggressive, and called it “choosing your battles” like your mother taught you….But what you were really teaching your children was to maintain and be strong until they had the proper fortifications to change their own path.
And yet in another, maybe you thought you were giving your child an easier path, teaching them nothing but to look for an easy way out or to depend on others to do “it” for them, but really, you were teaching them that there is no set way to do things and there is NOTHING wrong with doing things different from the masses and asking for help to do it since there are no directions for this method. This is the very definition of change.
In fact, nothing has ever changed in this world for the better without someone doing something outside the “norm.” Take heart people who are movers, shakers, boat rockers and/or parents: You are probably not messing up. 😉 You are simply doing something different, which is scary. BUT not necessarily wrong. Take faith that in the future you will understand the choices you make today and the path they lead you down tomorrow. You are cutting a path for others. Embrace your machete.