I have noticed that many of the blogs that I read have had something like a “year in review” wrap up blog in the last week. I used to do something similar back in the days of Myspace; I would post “Things I learned this summer or winter or fall or spring or year or whatever” and I have not done anything like that recently. So in homage to the yester-me and fellow bloggers, I offer my *2011 in Rearview.”
1) I never realized how much I would miss my old cohort in grad school. Even the ones I didn’t like, I liked. Who’d a thunk it? I am hoping to have as great a group of peeps to be around at my new school, but the bar is set high Vikings, the bar is set high.
2) I always thought that I hated to be alone and that was part of the reason that I was never single long; after spending nearly 3 months absolutely alone in a new town without even a dog or tv, I realized that I enjoy being alone but prefer it to be a choice. When I am forced to be alone and have absolutely nothing to do, ie: no job, I try to die from pneumonia.
3) Pneumonia is no effing joke and I have never been more scared about my health in my life. There is nothing like laying in bed alone with a fever, not being able to breathe or even get up, scared to sleep contemplating how long it would be before people realized you died. It was also the first time I experienced fever dreams. Not cool. You can keep them. It did however give me perspective on a lot of situations that I had not thought of, such as the couple this year that had the government deport one of them even though the one had complications of AIDS and needed his husband to help take care of him. It also made me want to pray for George Michael because Pneumonia is the effing devil. I can commiserate. Luckily, I was youngish and healthyish.
4) Quitting smoking in June was much easier with no one around to torment or tempt me.
5) Ironically, I think that part of my getting pneumonia was related to letting go of my dear dear friend tobacco. Sniff. I still miss him.
6) The illusion of your favorite place to visit certainly fades away when you have to live there.
7) Living in a place with a huge population of homeless makes me feel like a fat American, helpless, selfish and unsure of my ability to wear a social worker hat.
8) Concurrently, it impassions me to wear my social worker hat.
9) I don’t know if I should have used empassions or impassions in #8.
10) Everything about my life that I have absolutely hated in the last few years has absolutely prepared me for the current job that I have.
11) I really, really miss the NFP I worked at in Idaho. If you guys want to be part of an excellent group of people in Idaho, check it out: http://www.alphaidaho.org/
12) I miss my friends and took them forgranted when I lived near them.
13) I miss my family and took them forgranted when I lived near them.
14) Emotional affairs are a very real thing and not just a story to fill up a slot on the Today show. No pun intended. 🙂
15) I have worked with or for some pretty financially comfortable people in the last year and must say that I am much more emotionally, physically, and parentially? capable than most of them. That makes me feel better about the things that I feel my kids have missed out on because I am not rich and makes me feel better about the things I feel like I miss out on because I am not rich. If I could choose between being part of the 99% vs 1%, I honestly think I might pick 99%. Last year, I wouldn’t have said that.
16) I really learned a lot about myself, my relationships, and my kids in the last year.
17) I learn best by getting lost and finding my way home. Figuratively and physically.
I think that is all the introspection I have for myself and the world today.
Skip to 1:05 and enjoy the tunes from my estimated 8th ex-husband and his band: